Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
