How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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