He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just high enough for therapy.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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