i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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