on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
