I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
