Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
