I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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