Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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