the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
We just shotgunned beers for America
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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