I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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