Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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