i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Randomize
