Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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