If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
