Hey man sorry I got all grabby
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
