sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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