they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
