Pregnant stripper...not hot.
she woke up with a sticky ear
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
