Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
