He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
