The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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