Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Randomize
