We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
ok first of all what the fuck
I know her cup size but not her name....
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
