It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
