Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Life is so much better after having sex.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
