Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
