Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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