i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
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