Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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