Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
