he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
