I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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