you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize