I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize
