it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
