what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
