WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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