Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I believe in your delicious
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
