In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
