Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize