counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
