Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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