Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
