I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
My breasts were aching with rage.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
