We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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