youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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