No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
