I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Moan for me like Helen Keller
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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