I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I sprained my soul last night
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Someone came in the potted fern
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize