You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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