did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize